Why Are Men So Afraid of Marriage?

What’s with Male Marriage-Phobia?

It’s a timeless plot of romantic comedies: the wedding-crazed girl and her reluctant beau. Any subject that pops up so often in popular culture without a doubt has some basis in reality. Perhaps you’re experiencing some of that in your relationship right now. It hits different women at different times, but for most women there comes a point where she starts to wonder, “When is he going to marry me?” If you’re in a long-term relationship and wondering why it hasn’t moved to the next level, read on!

Reason #1: Loss of Freedom

Most men don’t really have concrete plans for the future like a lot of women do. For a man, committing to marriage can be scary because it represents a loss of freedom. For example, a lot of young men are focused on their careers. They want to feel like they are not tied down to anything so that they can relocate in their career advancement demands it. Even if you would be willing to move with him, marriage can still feel like a huge weight for a lot of men.

Of course, for some guys the idea of “freedom” is much more sordid. Sometimes, even men who are committed monogamists like to hold on to the idea that they could sleep with other women if they wanted to. Being “locked down” to the same women forever is a scary thought for many men who still have the urge to sow their wild oats.

Reason #2: Too Much Stress

While the idea of planning a wedding may seem like fun for you, for most guys it’s a nightmare of stress and expense. For men, this can start even before the wedding itself: he potentially has to go spend a good deal of money on a ring and think up some kind of romantic way to propose to you as well. It’s a lot of inconvenience for what seems to most men like very little gain, so this is another big turnoff to marriage.

Reason #3: What’s the Point?

Frankly, some guys just don’t see the point of marriage. For them, it’s just a piece of paper certifying that they love you and want to stay with you – so why go through all the hassle? In their minds, they already know that they love you and want to stay with you (or in the worst case scenario, they know that they don’t!).

At the end of the day, marriage is a complex issue that’s hard to boil down to just these three things. However, just because a man doesn’t want to marry doesn’t mean that he isn’t committed. It’s important to be patient – within reason – and wait for the right time!

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